Friday, April 25, 2008

just put it in the bag.

So, we're driving, and in the street this guy's yelling with this girl and when he sees us, he gets in his car and takes off. So we chase him, but it's like fuckin' OJ, I mean he's obeying the speed limit, and stopping and looking both ways before turning into the alleys and shit. So finally, before the last few blocks, he freaks out and steps on it. Then he takes off the wrong way down a one-way street and we follow. He hits the brakes and bails. So we go after him, following him down about six houses before we catch up to him.

And I've got two accidents on record, so another one gets me two days without pay. So we catch up to the guy, take him down, and I'm hitting him in the head when I hear this *crunch* sound come from behind us. The sonofabitch didn't put his car in park before he bailed, he put it in reverse!

So his car's backed against ours, so I tell my partner to grab the keys before the cars get stolen. And I'm cuffing this guy, and I'm like, "why the fuck would you put your car in reverse?!?"

Hey, you finally got some new headgear for kickboxing?

Yeah. I don't think it protects my nose very well, though, because I keep getting punched in it.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

If I had a boat, I'd go out on the ocean.

Man, the last few weeks have been busy. I feel like I've been saying that once a week for the past six months. I'm still enjoying working at the restaurant, though a little less than I have been. At least it gives me a little different perspective on things, and there's lots Wrigleyvillains to make fun of.

I had the day off today, my first since Easter, so I got productive. I went to the bank, went downtown to the DMV to get a new license that I've been putting off for a while, stopped by the Apple store, went to the Gap for some shirts, and had dinner at Dunlay's with Colin. Half of those things went well.

I stopped at the Apple store to possibly get a new ipod, as mine has been toast for several months now. I looked around and played with all the new toys and fantasized about getting a macbook Air. I used some applications, held it in my arms, and imagined running away together; social norms be damned. It was enticing.

In the end, I impulsively bought an ipod touch. I don't treat myself to big purchases very often, so I figured why not.

I found out the "why not" tonight when I got home and plugged it in. Apparently my operating system is too old to support it, and needs to be upgraded. Boo for impulse buys. Although, now I get two new cool things.

The DMV was hilarious. I think they hire the same contractor to do every DMV, and that guy does subdivision pre-fab basements in his spare time. They all have the same crummy drywall, buzzing fluorescent lights, and driving posters tacked with pushpins.

This time, however, there was a man from Saturn there to keep me company. He didn't work for the subsidiary of GM, though, he was actually from the planet Saturn. He told me himself. He also indulged me in the fact that he had not one, but two spaceships. He carried himself quite well, an older, well dressed gentleman, and made small talk with the woman at the counter. He made it known that he was a pimp, that he hadn't had to really work for twenty years, and that Mariah Carey was one of his prostitutes.

He was at the DMV getting his Earth license.